Attracting the Life You Want  

It doesn’t matter whether you’re looking for the perfect employee, a warm, trustworthy nanny, or your soulmate, we all have times when it feels like a stroke of good luck so broad that it would border on being a miracle would be the only way to find what we’re looking for. The same goes for circumstances. Maybe you’re moving and you’re hoping to find a house that will feel like home for years to come, but the real estate market isn’t working in your favor, you’re miserable in your job, but feel trapped, or you’re dealing with serious health issues and need a wise compassionate doctor, but with 150 names on your insurance list, you have no idea how to go about making the choice. It can feel daunting, but there’s good news; there are simple, reliable ways to attract the perfect people and situations into your life when you need them the most, and I’m not talking about the law of attraction.


Be the Person They’re Looking For


One of the simplest and most important things you can do to attract what you want into your life is to examine how you interact with the world. If your actions aren’t in alignment with the types of people and opportunities you want in your life, you’re never going to find what you’re looking for. We all have shortcomings, and you don’t have to be perfect to have great personal and professional relationships, but striving to be your best self will attract people who are also striving to be their best selves, and isn’t that what you want? A great boss won’t have as much trouble finding and retaining wonderful employees. Someone who cultivates healthy relationships and knows how to be a good partner will have an easier time attracting an emotionally healthy, loving partner. Like speaks to like.


Make Your Wishes Known


Like a superstitious child wishing on a star, too often we keep our desires to ourselves, believing that we’ll jinx ourselves or sound ridiculous if we tell other people what we’re looking for. This is the exact opposite of what we should be doing in order to find what we want, whether it’s a house, a job, or someone to share our life with. There is a reason networking events are so popular… networking works! You might not directly know the person you’re going to fall in love with or the perfect real estate agent to help you find the home you’ve been dreaming of, but chances are high that someone you know will know someone who knows someone. Speak up. Talk to anyone and everyone you know about what you’re looking for, and do it with a positive attitude and zero expectation of the person you’re talking to, and you’ll be amazed. Sometimes incredible connections happen in the most unexpected ways. One of many examples from my own life is that a close friend found her current job at a university because she was making small talk with a barista, and when she told the young woman what she was looking for, the barista was thrilled to tell her that the day before one of her professors had mentioned a job opening that was exactly what my friend was hoping to find. Things like this happen every single day, but only if you’re talking to people.


Meet New People


This goes hand in hand with talking about what you want. Talking to the people you already know is a great first step with networking, but you also need to put yourself in plenty of situations where you’ll meet new people. This could be something as casual as joining a sports club or social organization with regular events and talking to new people at your friend’s barbecue instead of sticking with the folks you already know. You can also enlist professional services that are geared specifically for your situation. If you’re looking for love, going to a speed dating even, joining an online dating service, or using a professional match maker will allow you to date people you never would have otherwise met. Taking out a help wanted ad that not only outlines exactly the type of person you’re hoping to find, but what you’d like to offer that person in exchange (a fun work environment, a kind boss, and a flexible work schedule for example) and attending professional networking events will greatly expand your pool of potential employees. Calling several real estate agents and meeting with a handful before deciding on the one who feels like a great fit will make finding your next home much more likely than just randomly signing on with the first agent you find online. In other words, do the work if you want to reap the rewards.


Show Gratitude


Once you’ve attracted the person or situation you were hoping for, you’re going to want to keep a good thing going. The best way to do this is by remembering how grateful and excited you were when you first found what you were looking for. This attitude of gratitude makes it a lot more likely that the positive things in our lives remain positive. Treat others the way you’d like to be treated, and your relationships, both personal and professional, will thrive. Give your all to the job you were so grateful to find, and you’ll be much more likely to have an appreciative boss, good relationships with your co-workers, and receive raises and promotions. If you found the most wonderful employee you could have ever hoped for, be the best boss they could have ever hoped for.


Have patience with the process. It takes time and effort to attract the right people and situations into your life, especially if you’re new to experience, but over time, these behaviors become habitual, just like any others. Once you’ve formed the habits that help you manifest the life you want, they’ll become so automatic that you’ll do them without thinking. When you find your groove with it, attracting what you want will feel as natural as breathing, and you’ll do it as a matter of course.